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The Character Profile for February/March is..................
Ms. Pauline Campbell Jones!
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Pauline has been with us since the days of Spent and is the Restart officer at Royston Vaseys Job Centre. Being a Restart officer means that you have to be kind, caring, considerate………

but Pauline is the opposite of this. She is rude, ignorant and Foul Mouthed.

Her archenemy is Ross Gains, the most intelligent job seeker on her restart course. He puts her through her paces by volunteering to interview her during an exercise for a job shoving trolleys round ASDA car park. Pauline gets mad at him because he dares to tell her what he thinks of her. At first she seems to just put it all behind her and continue with the course but then with a flick of her hair she smacks him in the face with her clip board and then proceeds to shove paper into his mouth shouting `Egregious am I? Foul Fuckin Mouthed? You`ll eat those words! Egregious! Egregious!`

However this is not the first time she has displayed violence. During another exercise she beets Ross round the head while he was trying to sell `The Big Issue` which is a magazine, a bit like `Bunty` but written by tramps, again because he refused to cooperate with her and her bullying.
Despite all of this, we can’t help but feel sorry for her when Ross`s true identity is disclosed. Because of Ross, Pauline looses her job, which is everything to her, and her only means of support, her pens.

In series 2, she’s back!! But this time she IS the worthless dole scum! She turns up to do the restart course thinking that she will be the restart officer. Until she meets Cathy Carter Smith the new restart officer. According to CC Smith, Pauline is a psychotic 50 year old lesbian. Pauline is then subjected to some of her on bullying medicine and makes a triumphant exit from her restart course with `monkey man` Mickey calling her back.
She is then offered a job as an assistant food science operative. Which actually means she`s working down Burger Me with Mickey. Even though the job isn`t very good she seems to be in with a chance of keeping it as she gets on with Mickey. But then, who should walk into Burger Me but the Evil Ross! He orders a veggie burger with mustard into which Pauline `puts something of herself` (spit) and squeezes one of Mickeys spots into the burger, which has already been on the floor. Bllaggghhhh!
This was all caught on camera and so she ends up loosing her job and has to go back on the dole which means getting up at dinner and flicking herself off to `Trisha` and when Ross gets his revenge on her for making him beg like a dog, she attacks him in the restart room and holds him as a hostage tied up in selotape.

She has ransom of getting her job back, a big massive box of pens with the words Paulines Pens written in the side and a fire engine for Mickey. However, her pleas fall on deaf ears. Paulines hostage has become hungry and so she goes to the nibble box to get sandwiches leaving Mickey in charge of Ross. Bad Idea!! When she comes back, she discovers that Ross has hit Mickey and run away to the police so she is soon arrested and that is the last time we ever see our beloved Pauline.

Past characters were Benjamin Denton, Tubbs Tatsyrup, Herr Lipp and Les McQueen. If you would like to see these then email me, my address is on the page info section and will happily send you a copy. However, this will be for your own private use and must not be displayed on a web page without my permission.